For someone with an eating disorder like myself, what to eat is a huge decision. Contemplating what to eat may even take an hour. Depending on the day. Today, i wanted to eat only 800 calories but i knew that would disappoint my mom. So i drank most of a 400 calorie protein drink, and we went to baker square.
Before the eating disorder, i never really had trouble deciding what to eat on a menu. But now, instead of giving us extra time to order, the waitress seemed to come back within seconds of handing us the menus. Or maybe it was just me? There was just so much food to choose from.. it was very overwhelming. In the end, i ended up ordering a veggie omlet, a cinnamon roll, a small serving of fruit, and a slice of pie. I guess now that i'm saying it, it doesn't seem like much food but restaurant portion sizes are completely ridiculous. They're huge serving of food and it seems like so much to eat.
So i ate most of the omlet, split the cinnamon roll with my mom, and ate all of the fruit and pie. Also when i got home, i had poptarts.
Now, it seems like a lot of food. My mom says thats what the average person eats but i don't know. I want to eat 1,200 calories a day and work out for an hour which is a big step from what i used to do but my mom "won't let me do that". She says the average teenage girl needs to be eating 1,500 calories a day to just sit and breathe and that i should eat more if i exercise. I wish she would just accept that i am eating more....