It took me a long time to actually face the demon instead of just listening to the lies it told me. For a long time, I wore a size that was almost too small for me because I liked the small size, not the actual clothes. I would ignore the risks and still eat less because thats all I knew how to do. Now, everything has changed.
I'm not afraid anymore. I don't want to be cold anymore or have my brain shrink from lack of food or even have my heart shrink! Before I went to the new clinic, I didn't even know these things. I didn't know the heart shrunk. It did, because its a muscle and when you have an eating disorder, you get really weak.
I want to live now. I want to make a difference. Not gaining weight, isn't going to make a difference. I have to eat more than the average person eats and face my fears because I want to live. Being underweight for so long, is not living. I don't want people to ask me if I'm anorexic on formspring, and I don't even want them to question if I have an eating disorder anymore. I want to be healthy, strong, and beautiful.
We can all beat this. Don't be afraid, we can do this<3
I always listen to this song when I'm feeling sad, it always makes me feel better and stronger.