Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Making a difference

As soon as I realized that I actually did want to recover, I wanted to help others recover too! Because recovery is so hard to do on your own! You have to face the table every day and eat, and be brave. For a while, I wasn't very brave. I would talk to other people who had an eating disorder, and they would beg me to eat more and I would tell them I don't feel like trying. I was too scared to face the demon, to stare it in the face and tell it that it was wrong.

It took me a long time to actually face the demon instead of just listening to the lies it told me. For a long time, I wore a size that was almost too small for me because I liked the small size, not the actual clothes. I would ignore the risks and still eat less because thats all I knew how to do. Now, everything has changed.

I'm not afraid anymore. I don't want to be cold anymore or have my brain shrink from lack of food or even have my heart shrink! Before I went to the new clinic, I didn't even know these things. I didn't know the heart shrunk. It did, because its a muscle and when you have an eating disorder, you get really weak.

I want to live now. I want to make a difference. Not gaining weight, isn't going to make a difference. I have to eat more than the average person eats and face my fears because I want to live. Being underweight for so long, is not living. I don't want people to ask me if I'm anorexic on formspring, and I don't even want them to question if I have an eating disorder anymore. I want to be healthy, strong, and beautiful.

We can all beat this. Don't be afraid, we can do this<3

I always listen to this song when I'm feeling sad, it always makes me feel better and stronger.


9 comments:

  1. Love your today's post! Keep it up Danielle!!

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  2. Yay!! It sounds like you're doing well. :)
    I loovee that song, too!
    <3

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  3. What a beautiful post! REcovery is great when you share your support with others =)

    xoxo

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  4. Thank you so much for this uplifting post! Your determination is such an inspiration to me! Awesome song, too. :-) <3

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  5. This is so refreshing to read, thank you :) I've been reading a lot of negative posts lately (mine included..) and this really made me smile. Thank you for being such an inspiration!

    xxx

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  6. This is a beautiful post with such a positive attitude. And that is what beating this is all about, the attitude you carry. This is great. Keep it up!!!

    I love this song too, and the music video tells such a great little story with a fantastic message.

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  7. <3 Thank you for the beautiful attitude. This post is such inspiration. <3

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