I'm not really sure why eating was so hard on Sunday, but it just was. I couldn't stand to eat anything, and my mom didn't really help me much at all. I want her to care, but I don't want her to control me either.. if she can't find a balance then I'll have to just try to take care of myself. I'm on my way there at least!
Yesterday, was okay. For dinner we ate out like we usually do at night (we're trying to stop) and I had a baked potato w/ broccoli, herbs, and cottage cheese. It was delicious! And I had fries and a smoothie with it too. I thought for once it was pretty balanced, I was kinda proud of myself(: And that I allowed myself to have fast food fries. I haven't had those in months!
When we got home, I watched some Degrassi and then went on Facebook. But something on there triggered me.. I'm not sure, I just kept comparing myself to some of my friends. Saying they were much much thinner and prettier than me. So I felt horrible and didn't even want to go to bed.
I always get really depressed at bedtime anyway, so with this hanging over my head I felt awful. I really wanted to talk to my mom and try to feel better, but she just kept saying go to bed over and over again, so I just went and cried by myself.
After she finally came to find me 20 minutes later, I was still really sad. But, my dog made me feel so much better! She kept trying to lick me and sit by me, and she wouldn't stop licking me until I felt better and stopped crying. If I stopped crying and then started again, she tried again too! There's no way feeling sad around her, she just doesn't let you!
So, I'm really thankful for my dog. Even if I have to fight by myself, this is one battle that I'll win.
Dogs are so cool. <3!
ReplyDeleteExcept when they chew your favorite shoe/blanket/whatever! Haha!
I don't have a facebook right now. I did, but I never got on it, so I just deleted it. Even if I still had one, I'd never feel like updating it. And like you, I'd probably sit and compare myself to everyone else's life. And that's no way to be happy. You do YOU, and be the awesome Danielle that I've come to know!
<3 Tori
I love dogs!!! :) Your dog is so cute...I can't help but go awwww over your pictures of her. WHat's her name again?
ReplyDeleteI am sorry that you had a rough night!! That was not fun. :(
The important part was that you got through it. Hugs.
Aw your dog is so cute! Take care if yourself darlin d, you deserve health. Xx
ReplyDeleteDogs are amazing! My dog, Red, saved me once when I was trying to kill myself. I was trying to jump but she held on to my clothes and wouldn't let me...They seem to know our emotions without us saying anything and are there just to listen and love on us!! btw- your dog is adorable!!
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry you had a rough night - :( You worked through it though - BUT before you got home you ate an amazing nutritionally balanced meal!! WAY TO GO!!
big HUG! Hope today was better.
okay, your dog is ADORABLE. I had a dog...for 24 hours...then I had to sell it back bc I couldn't handle a dog. I ended up with 2 cats instead...
ReplyDeleteyou can win the fight. you've got it in you babe. We're here together.
xoxo
*hug*
ps- do you have fb?
Your dog is so cuuuuute! I hope you had a better day!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the comment- I'm following you now. :)
ReplyDeleteSorry you had such a rough night. I saw a photo of you on your blog and I think you're thin and pretty. :) Smile, sweetie!
@Vegan Chick Pea, please do not comment on my weight. I am thin from starving myself for months. I have an eating disorder and this is an eating disorder blog. Yes, I am happy about being thin but not happy about how I got there.
ReplyDelete